I'm still not sure if I have words for yesterday. It was one of those days that make me wonder why we were chosen to live this life. It was a day that left me wondering if the future will be any easier or if things will always be this difficult.
There was an auto show in town on Saturday. Just the local dealers letting everyone sit in the cars, they had some fun handouts for the kids. My friends were going so I thought it would be fun. We've been to a few before and it wasn't too bad. Dawson did pretty good with the first section. We worked on listening when I asked him to get out and he enjoyed himself. Then he started not listening at all. He climbed into the cab of a large Dodge truck, climbed out the back window into the box. I couldn't reach him. He then proceeded to climb onto the roof! Thankfully he finally responded to my (not so quiet at this point) requests to get down. He did but was running back and forth in the box. We finally grabbed him and put him in the stroller. He screamed and cried, then figured out how to push the button to unlatch the stroller harness. I was feeling pretty defeated at this point, since the stroller is the one place I can put him so he is safe and secure. Now he can get out. I put him back in and made him sit. He then screamed louder and gagged himself so he'd puke. We rolled to the garbage can and proceeded to clean up puke. He did it several times, getting madder with each time I stopped him. Just then our friends walked in. Lovely sight to walk in on. :(
I brought him to the bathroom, cleaned him up and we had a short discussion. He was feeling calmer and totally over the incident. I told him that mommy is very angry that he is not listening. He looked sad to hear that and said he wants mommy to be happy. I told him he needs to listen or we are going home. He was quite serious and looking a little sheepish at this point, which is a good sign since he usually doesn't seem to get the big deal. So we joined our friends and Dawson was perfect for a while. He would only need a reminder that mommy is going to get upset if he doesn't listen and he would say "mommy happy!" and then follow through.
We got invited to a BBQ and bonfire after the auto show, so we went to their house. Supper went well, other than Dawson being his usual picky self. They have a dog, which Dawson loved. He kept climbing on the furniture though, trying to go downstairs, trying to run outside. It's so frustrating. I always leave wondering if people will bother inviting us back. My time is spent constantly running after Dawson and I really don't get a chance to visit much at all. Yet if he doesn't go anywhere, he'll never learn how to deal with going places. It's just so frustrating. Then he'll come over and rub my cheek, give me that big cheesy smile and a kiss on the cheek. Thank goodness he's cute!
We went out to the bonfire and he wanted to ride bike. Dan followed him up and down the sidewalk on the bike. It was a very quiet housing development. He did that for quite a while, then had some marshmallows and switched to a trike. He was turning around and coming back nicely, so Dan was standing at the driveway watching and reminding him to turn around. He was doing great. Then he decided to dart up the neighbor's driveway. The neighbor was at our bonfire, very friendly people. Dan ran after him, thankfully the house was super close. He followed Dawson into their garage and caught up with him just after Dawson went into their house and locked the door. He wouldn't unlock the door, so Dan ran over and told me. Thankfully the guy had a spare key in his garage and told us that the guns in the house were not loaded. Somehow that was not very reassuring to me. Just the fact that he went into a total stranger's house and then the reminder of the potential dangers inside was about giving me a heart attack. I was pretty shaken up to say the least. The moment they unlocked the door in the garage, Dawson panicked and ran out the front door, which was previously locked as well. He ran back to my friend's house so fast. I caught up with him and he said "I'm all done! I'm all done!". He knew he had way crossed the line and that mommy was beyond not happy! He sat down in a chair and had a time out. He got over that one quickly though. We didn't stay much after that.
I was still pretty upset when we got home. It seems like everytime we try to go somewhere fun, something happens. He'd been getting better though and I had hopes that he would continue to do better. It's just so frustrating. Hopefully someday we'll look back on this with relief that it is no longer an issue. I try to remain hopeful.
We didn't get to donate the toys to Children's yet. The family I was going to meet suddenly couldn't, so we're rescheduling to make it a 1 time stop. I'm hoping for sometime this week.