After we got home, a friend I met at ECFE class came over to help clean and organize. She organized my pantry cabinet and got many things cleaned up. She also brought baskets she'd found on sale and put them to good use. I love them! Now all those bottles and things aren't tipping over on our shelf that doesn't have a solid surface.
Dan and I went rollerskating Tuesday night. Our friends couldn't make it, but it was nice to get out anyway. I was so tired when I got home afterward, I felt like I hadn't stopped moving all day! It felt good though.
Gabriel is still pretty darn cute and he knows it.
She had brought this cube storage to put in the closet to utilize more space. The shoes had been sitting in a pile at the bottom of the closet or on a rug outside the closet. It's so much more open to not have shoes there! Has a spot for hats and gloves too. Dawson caught on quickly that this is where his shoes go. Today he'd just ditched them on the rug and I just had to ask them to put his shoes away and he remembered they go in here now and put them away.
Dawson's Psychologist appt went well this morning. This lady didn't grab at him or try to ask him questions he didn't understand. She just observed and talked to me. She answered some questions and gave some suggestions and we talked about how he understands things and what might help him to understand better. Dawson played a magnet puzzle, wrote letters and numbers on the dry erase board and then played catch with a ball. He threw the ball really high once and bumped the clock on the wall, which proceeded to fall down and the glass broke to pieces. Never a dull moment with us it seems! He didn't get hit or anything, he ran and stood behind me though, looking at it with that "uh oh!" look on his face.
After the appt we went to "The O Store", which is Target. He sees the big red O on the side and just calls it the O store. He was very excited to find out Grandma was there. We had planned to meet up, but Dawson didn't understand the concept of Grandma being at the store. He heard "Grandma" and wanted to go to her house. Once we saw her van, he was very excited. He got to look at toys with Grandma for about 20 minutes, then it was time for school. So Dawson and I went to his school, he had a slight tantrum, but it was over when his teacher brought out the iPad for him to play with. Apparently all the Special Ed teachers have them for the kids to learn with and kids like Dawson really do well with them. He was navigating that thing so well! Swiping his finger to the side to go to different pages, pointing to things and finding the games he likes. It was neat to see him enjoying it so much. Too bad they're so expensive! Afterward I went back to Target where my mom still had Gabriel and we looked around some more. I think I'm set for Christmas ideas for everyone now.
Gabriel and I got home and he was napping, so I let him sleep for a bit. It looks so nice in there. Feels so good to walk in and see empty kitchen counters instead of a cluttered mess. I round the corner and find more free space! It's so refreshing. I decided to bake some cookies. Someone had brought over some cookie dough that's already made into cookie blobs, so I just had to put them on the sheet. It really seemed too easy! Turned out to be a good thing though, since Gabriel woke up and wanted to nurse. Shortly after Dawson got home on the bus, a friend stopped over with a meal she'd made. They've been so nice to have! Not having to worry about cooking, especially when we've been so busy or just so unmotivated to make anything decent, has been great! Otherwise I'm sure we'd be living on pizza and chicken nuggets because it's easy! Instead we've had lasagna, homemade soup, meatloaf, chicken enchiladas, beef stew, chicken/rice dish, and many other good meals. I'm constantly blown away by people's generosity.
This evening we had ECFE class. Dawson decided he wanted to play outside, but it was too cold and dark for that. Once we got in the classroom he was fine though. Gabriel loves class. He flirts with all the moms and teachers and is right at home. He was so used to all the attention at the hospital, he's not used to things being so quiet at home. So we get to places like that and he just lights up and is so happy. Gabriel likes the ball pit, he actually dives for it and sit there and watches the kids jump around and throw balls. Dawson takes running leaps into it and Gabriel smiles so big. It's nice to see them happy.
It's still pretty hard to be in the same preschool room and gym that we were in with Tyler. Tomorrow it will be 1 month without Tyler and I still sometimes can't believe he's really gone. I still have moments when I'm in the store or doing something where it feels like I should be keeping an eye out for 3 kids. It's like one is missing and then I remember I only have 2 now. It's still so hard, those moments when I think about him not ever being here again. He's in my mind every moment of every day, but there are still times where I really think more about things and it's so painful. Dawson has been having a harder time too. Yesterday when we got in the van he said "go see Tyler". I talked to him about it again and he ignored me and said "no, go see Tyler". The one that killed me was "give Tyler kiss". All he wants to do is go give his brother a kiss, and he has no idea why he isn't able to. I sure wish I could find the words to help him understand. So far, nothing is really working. No parent or sibling should have to go through this.